My lazy friend refuses to get a job

Thursday June 10 2021
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Personal discipline and respect for time, especially other people’s time, are admirable traits. PHOTO | FILE

By Nation. Africa

Dear Brenda,

I have a talented friend, but he refuses to get a job. Everything that we send him to apply for he refuses, or makes a silly excuse as to why he won't apply for it. He lives at home, and it feels like he is happy to live at home forever, even though he is approaching 30. This is weird, right?


Dear Concerned,

Unless you're his mother, let this man live his life. Of course, it bothers you that your friend is refusing the version of adulthood you would prefer for him, but that's just it - that's the version that you prefer for him. You sound like you're not living at your parents' place (I would hope not, considering that email) and that's the direction you've chosen for yourself, but truly, you can't make an almost 30-year-old man care more about his situation if he doesn't already; and you can't care more about his life and future than he does. You just keep sending him those job applications and supporting him in that way, or as far as you are able, because you may not know the full truth of his situation. Maybe he needs a break. Maybe he's going through something. Maybe he doesn't care. Either way, until his parents kick him out or something...this is none of your business, mostly because there is nothing you can do outside of getting inside his brain and making him work, is there?

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